Mike Hosking and Kate Hawkesby: Our Thinking (2023)

For a private couple, it was the most public proposition imaginable. Two weeks ago, on a bridge packed with shoppers on a Sunday morning, prominent TV and radio presenter Mike Hosking got down on one knee and asked his partner and colleague Kate Hawkesby to marry him.

"I felt really sorry for him," remembers Kate (37). "I know how shy he is, so I wanted him to do that in front of so many people... I just wanted him to stop! So as he declares his love for me, all he can hear me say is : 'Get up, get up, get up! !'".

"It was important for me to do this outdoors," says Mike (45). "Anyone can propose privately, but I wanted to make the gesture for Katie."

However, up until the moment she stood on the bridge with her knee bent, Kate had no idea what was in store for her and it was enough to confuse our five children, so I guess we left it at that.

But Mike had other ideas. “I don't think it's someone who needs to get married,” says radio host Newstalk ZB, “but I think it's something beautiful, lasting and committed.

"I had been traveling for a while so I started planning and organizing the ring and realizing we would be away from the kids for a few days over the school holidays I booked a last minute trip to Melbourne."

The couple went on their first official date two years ago, when Mike invited Kate to dinner in Melbourne while filming the TV show.Who wants to Be a Millionaire?

“He booked first-class airline tickets, called me and said, 'Just get on the plane.' We would go out for dinner and during the day we would cross this little bridge over the Yarra River from the Langham Hotel into town and shop,” says Kate.

“I love taking pictures, so I would insist he stop to pose on the bridge. For us, it became a little Yarra joke.

"I found it unpleasant to propose in a hotel room and even more so in a restaurant because people start gossiping, and then I remembered the bridge and how important it was to us from the beginning. I thought Sunday morning would be pretty quiet." , it says.

But he had to get Kate out of bed and onto the bridge, which turned out to be a problem. She remembers: "We arrived late the night before and it was really exciting to be on holiday because we hadn't had a break from the kids in a long time, so I planned to relax before going shopping at 10am. But we woke up really early because we still had time in New Zealand and Mike kept rushing me. We finished breakfast when I was stuffed and he wasn't eating and I was like, 'Why can't he just relax?'"

Finally, Mike persuaded a feisty Kate to go for a "walk" on chilly Melbourne mornings, long before the store opened. Now all he had to do was make them stop at the top of the bridge.

"And, luckily, I was a part of it," recalls Kate. "I told him, 'We're on our special bridge, we have to take a picture of the bridge.' The next thing she knew Mike was giving her a card to read. Kate says: "He is very romantic and always gives me cards with nice words."

In fact, Mike had already given her a card on the plane, then another when they got to the hotel, but Kate still had no idea that something was wrong. "To be honest, it's pretty normal behavior for Mike," he laughs.

"He sends me fluffy messages saying that I am the love of life of him blah blah blah..." But this letter was a little different. "It had all the usual wonderful romantic things, but it ended with a beautiful quote from an Italian poet, Cesare Pavese, who says: 'We don't remember days, we remember moments,' and then he had written, 'and this is the moment I want you to remember. forever...'

"I closed the card and said 'great' or something, and then he dropped to his knees, fumbling in his jacket pocket and shaking so hard I thought he was having a heart attack," he smiles. Kate tried to pick him up, but Mike remained resolutely on the ground, telling her he was determined to get it right and throwing his proposal.

"In the meantime," recalls Kate, "all these people came out of nowhere and started staring and pointing, and all I could think of was how to get him to stand up and stop." stand up for a moment instead of yelling 'stand up, stand up' over and over again, the speech would have been much longer and much more romantic."

But instead, he chose to place the ring on her finger before waiting to find out whether or not she would accept. Kate continues: "I looked at this beautiful ring as she explained that each of the five carats represents each of our five children and I was blown away. I think I said yes at one point. So I grabbed some students passing by and asked them to take one. picture of us."

Kate says the proposal was so unexpected that it took days for her to understand. "We just exist together in a bubble, we don't tell anyone and we keep saying, 'Oh my God! I can't believe this is happening.'"

Kate called her parents, John and Joyce Hawkesby, to share the good news. "And they said, 'We know!'" In an old-fashioned romantic gesture, Mike called Kate's parents to ask permission to marry their daughter.

"I thought it would be funny, humbling, funny and decent," says John of his future son-in-law's call. Although, like John, he couldn't resist making Mike's life a little difficult. “He proposed to my daughter and I said, 'To be honest, Mike, we were expecting someone a little taller.' ' John laughs.

And when Mike spoke to Joyce, she told him that she wasn't sure Kate would say yes. John explains: "Kate said she wasn't particularly interested in getting married again and was happy with how things were going so we didn't feel we could speak for her."

But John couldn't be happier to have Mike as his daughter's husband and stepfather to his grandchildren. “Actually, I don't think of him as much younger than I am. He was always old”, jokes the former TV presenter. “I don't think he had a teenager. He was born at the age of 28 and worked at Rádio Nacional. But when he met Kate, there was a complete change. He started buying Ed Hardy designer clothes and wearing jeans with diamonds on the hem. My daughter was dating one of the villagers!"

But John says he thought Mike was the right man for Kate from the start. "He made Kate very happy, was absolutely brilliant with their children and impressed her with his genuine sense of care and consideration."

While planning his proposal, Mike also called his mother Anne and sister Joanne to break the good news to them, telling them the one thing they both already knew: "This is forever." their five children: Mike's twins Bella and Ruby, 9, and Kate's three children, Jackson, 11, Josh, 9, and Marley, 3.

Says Kate: "We lit candles, put flowers on the table, drank champagne and the kids blew bubbles into champagne flutes, and then Mike said, 'I have a very special and exciting announcement to make.'" Jackson rose to toast, high fives around and immediate questions about the possibilities of the florist. So they started composing love and romance songs for the wedding. one jumped on the piano and the other on the guitar and arguments began about who would perform first at the wedding."

She says that if that happens, her big day will be for the kids. “There aren't many changes for them now that we're so established. We already live together and have done the hard work of merging our family together, so it's not a big deal for them. It's more about a big party and some new clothes as far as they're concerned.

For Mike and Kate, the engagement not only cements their relationship, but is also an opportunity to break a long silence about their lives. "When we first became friends on TVNZ 13 years ago, it was because of our similar sense of humour," says Kate. "We laughed all the time, so everyone thought we had to sleep together because we were so funny." Mike adds: "A lot of people thought we were annoying, too funny, too smart and too clichéd."

"He's not a very inclusive person, he's not a team player," explains Kate. "He thought that because one person took him, that was all he needed, and it didn't go so well." "In short, that was it," Mike agrees. Thus, over the years, the two became the target of many rumors that they chose to ignore as best they could. "When you're harassed by people making accusations and claims that aren't accurate, it becomes very difficult to get your way and your natural defense is to shut up and shut up, otherwise it all gets out of hand," says Kate.

"The most important thing is not to see ourselves as a big problem for other people," says Mike. "For me, it's my life and I can barely breathe with excitement, but I've been through enough with people calling me, stalking me and boring me to know better than to leave it at that." Okay, let's get married, bang, let's get on with our lives."

Kate comments: "People can be so wrong. We've learned that some say what they want anyway, but this time we wanted to make sure it's a positive celebration and that the message is coming from us." But when they started their relationship, it was a different story, especially for Kate. . She says: "Mike has always been on my side and he's such a good and decent person. It's not true, he's a very traditional and conservative guy who is always focused on doing the right thing.

I found that these qualities gave me a lot of power and he grounded me in a spectacular way." When it came to taking the relationship beyond friendship, she had concerns. Mike recalls, "I was worried about what would happen if it didn't work out. What if ruin a great friendship? Could we go back to what we had?"

"And," says Kate, "that's where Mike is a tall, nice person. He promised me in his life that he would love me like his best friend for the rest of his days and would never be bitter, perverted, upset, or unhappy. Of course , deep down, I knew it would work, he was always in front of me."

Worried about their friendship, Kate almost didn't go on that first date in Melbourne, but her mother gave her the push she needed. "Then I totally freaked out," Kate laughs. "I wanted to put on a hat, a wig and sunglasses, but Mike was totally cool. I saw another side of him."

Says Mike: "She's at the airport after our first date and she's like, 'You guys are looking at me. You know that!' I had to tell him to get over it." His perseverance paid off and Mike now has a partner who he says completes him completely. "She's everything I want to be but I'm not," he says.

"She's kind, she's better with people than I am. She makes me more human." But more importantly, put up with my extraordinary crap. I am aware that I am an unusual person. If you get past that, I'm pretty cool," he jokes, "but not many make it!"

"So it's a privilege," adds Kate, "to be one of the few to have made it." "The trick for me," chuckles Mike, "is accepting the insanity because it's me." It refers to his passion for the house. cleanliness, something he has been much ridiculed for over the years.

"It became a running joke at home," smiles Kate. “Kids will ask where it is, and I'll say, 'Where do you think it is?' and there he is, happy as everyone else with his little sponge washing the car, talking to himself and fixing it."

She says that living with Mike means vacuuming and having a clean car every day. "That's right, the six of us go for it. But Mike says he's not the only one with unusual habits. Kate makes lists. " We have 1,800 lists at home. I'll take it," he says. "She tends to worry about the little things, but she's getting better at letting some of them slide."

"And the house runs like clockwork with five kids, which is no small feat," notes Kate. "Clean cars, a well-run household, and she's a brilliant mother," says Mike. "It's perfect." With Kate's famous attention to detail, Mike took the risk of designing and ordering her engagement ring without input from her elegant partner.

She smiles: "The cool thing I love about Mike is that he looked at the diamond ring that I wear all the time, which is my first engagement and wedding rings, as well as my mum's engagement rings and both grandparents. I made them." It forms a ring and is very sentimental to me.

“Mike took one look and designed our ring in the same pattern to match. Some men might have felt threatened because I was wearing my ring from my first marriage, but he doesn't care." "To be fair," Mike adds, "if she didn't like it, I wouldn't have minded. We could have moved on. .

"It couldn't be more perfect," Kate smiles, leaning in and kissing her new husband.

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